Had this exhange with MC over email. Best of luck to him.
Your blog is a great contribution.
I have question I hope you will answer.
I’m a professional screenwriter working in Hollywood I was on a major project and realized in being myself “I had no value”, I left the project. I have developed my skills for 10+ years in my sandbox where my successes weren’t large but luckly neither the failures and now I’m ready to give to my audience, give to the machine on my terms, but because I’ve worked in any genre and on any project that paid I have no idea who my market/audience is or “how” I would find it with certainty. Not a false reflection of what I “think/wish” it is.
My question is for point #2 on “Be yourself”: What is the process one would go about to find their market/audience/tribe?
Appreciate any insight on this.
Hey man, I assume you read both?
Please get me some details on how the hollywood thing failed. What went off?
Yeah I read both; it hasnt failed just a series of wake up calls, including your blog made me realize I had alot illusions that look damn real and alot of people in the machine telling me the illusions are real to get what they want out of me but now I know better and I want the real thing. I had lot of opportunities people would kill for, but an opportunity is just an opportunity.
The details are I was brought in by a movie company, I quickly I saw I had only half the skills needed to be the writer “I” wanted to be, so while I worked on my skills I worked for the company developing projects.
Cut to 10 years later, I’m working on a major show, in a lower position than what I’m qualified for, eating a lot of shit. Then I realized, its cause I have no value, I quit the show, and work on the last missing pieces of my skills. Im all ready to write and I freeze…I have the ideas, I have the skills, but I don’t know which one to write, I realized the whole problem was not even my skills as much as I don’t know who my market is or ever was, I only did projects for money and to please the powers that be.
Its no different than a session guitarist realizing he’s only decent, going into his sandox getting his skills together and when he’s ready to make his own album he realizes “oh shit what kind of album do I make, I’ve played with all these artists, in all these different genres, I like them all, and I wanna give to myself , to my market, and to the machine but which one is “truly me” and NOT the one I wish I was or want to appear to be?”
How long does it take you to write a quick manuscript? I heard somewhere that the Spinal Tap script was less than 15 pages. So, how quick can you put together your, say, main 5 movie ideas, into 5 scripts?
Spinal Tap was a mockumentary so much of the stuff was improv on set to make it feel real. The 15 pages would have been the big beats of story and they just went on set and riffed it, kept the funny bits based off the 15 pages.
To write a normal feature length script is 110 pages takes 3 to 6 months. Deadline for new submissions is February/early March. A writer typically takes their two best ideas, writes them simultaneously and picks the best one to submit.
Aight, this is how I see it.
The 10 years gig wasnt a sandbox, it was a job. A sandbox is a place where you’re safe to try new things and to grow into yourself, and where you can manage to make mistakes AND make homeruns. Sure, you can still make homeruns at a job, but it doesnt mean the job is a sandbox.
If you spent 10 years and after leaving you’re still confused about which direction to go, it was a trap-box.
So now you have to produce original material and you’re back to hit or miss, homerun or failure mindset. It adds pressure, the pressure makes you overthink it. In short, you have no experience or confidence here, and you have too much pressure. Chances are you will fail. Statistically, you will.
What I would do, since you have different genres and stuff you want to attack.
I would write them down in sequences. I dont know how do you call this but Im sure there’s a way to write down a movie in a few paragraphs / pages.
I would spend three – four months writing five or six. Or more. Depends on how prolific you are and how many ideas you have.
Then I would gather my friends and contacts and see which script has better reception / which one I enjoyed writing the most.
Then finish that one FIRST. Then keep on the second one. etc.
And I’d assume Im going to finish and sell all 5 and expect nothing in return. Sandbox style. All risk zero dependence.
Thanks for your help man, Im on it starting today.
Np- hope you make it big bro.
Repressing emotions always magnifies them.
That rock you want to avoid is the rock you hit.
Whatever holds your imagination is whatever ends up happening.
What you put your mind into is what you make real.
So dont hold on to the negative.
She could have just taken the cat out of the box. She could have argued back. She could have done something. Out of the box.
But she was too worried about not pressing the button.
Incredible, plus she sent him back to jail 48 hrs after releasing him. I guess he’ll commit suicide. But hey it doesn’t stop here! how about this
Other than that, Im very vagina friendly. Just not when the vagina is on a pedestal, and the pedestal has law enforcements.
Haha. So. Beauty cheats on Nerd, Nerd exposes her.
Beauty gets angry at Nerd. What’s wrong with HIM?
She’s the one at fault, but she manages to avoid blame by putting the onus everywhere else. Maybe she can escape punishment if she acts like the one being injured.
It works. Nerd begs for forgiveness. Seriously. Maybe he needs kamasutra lessons too.
From this point on, any new spectator is just going to see a running Beauty being chased by an evil supplicating Nerd. Yeah, I can be your white knight too, baby. Just come closer. And go lower. Yes baby that feels good!
Why is the other dude wearing a pink bandana?
Why on earth, why?
In response to M3′s post, worth a read.
Let’s try to be succint. hah. Impossible.
SEX MARKET PLACE
The SMP and the hormones and stuff arent there so you can have true love. They are there to help you breed and to maximize your offspring’s survival.
You dont get a boner when you see a hot girl because you want true love. You dont want to compete and prove and you dont get all the angst and all the drive that lets you do wonderful, and often stupid stupid things for “girls” so you can have true love.
At the same time, status is for girls what hotness is for guys. Or, hotness, from the girl’s point of view, it’s a compendium of many things, where physical appereance is just one important trait among many other important traits.
Just to touch the tip of it: masculinity has a surplus of resources (sperm), or it should, and femininity has limited resources (ovules), or it should. And this sets the basis for a holla lot of behavioral traits. Plus the femininity has to feed the baby and the masculinity should stay around to make war with external aggressors and protect her and the baby. Oh. Maybe that feeling, the whole thing, you can call love.
But we’re really talking instinct.
When you see a girl you like you get that boner or you dont. There’s no talking you into it. Or there shouldnt. But, let’s say you’re looking at a girl that doesnt particularly arouse you, until you see her naked, then wow! now we’re talking. But then she turns around and you see her ass and is ugly and has some weird shit on it, and your boner goes off. But then she comes closer with that look in her eyes etc? and the boner comes again. Or she goes away for a couple of years and comes back way prettier. Or, she was a very very pretty girl, and you see her years after and she’s jaded and gray, and uglier, and you feel pity instead of getting a boner. Sad right?
So what’s love have to do with it? nothing.
Girls are looking for Mr. Right. This is “the man” whos the best prospect, and who has chances of sticking around. However, girls usually have other people who can stick around for them, friends family the state etc. And thanks to feminism they dont need a man to stick around – they can make their own money and get the feed somewhere else. So mr. Right is, basically, the hottest, higher value, more fit man they can snatch RIGHT NOW.
Hypergamy for short term. Hypergamy without the sticking around part.
What’s love have to do with it? nothing.
Hormones, attraction, selection, screening, all the stuff that was there to increase your survival, all the pain and pleasure and the chemical cocktail.
It’s all about the sex. It is a highly emotional issue for girls. It’s all passional and breath taking, and feelings of “love” are in it, too. But it’s all about the sex. It’s about the survival. It’s your genes, talking the talk.
Men screen for the hottest girl, girls screen for the more fit man. And it’s all about the sex.
We’re basically a tournament species. We built a huge society that needs other arrangements… but at our core we’re still tournament. The guys compete. The girls cheer and build a net of chit chat and gossip so they can assess a general agreement, a safe-bet agreement, of who’s hot and who’s a creep. The girls cheer like crazy and faint for the stars. The guys lock down practicing and making money and trying to climb. The ones who succeed get big rewards. The winners are more attractive. The losers, nobody wants them. Some guys are born at the top and already attractive – and girls do faint for them, think of prince Harry, think of… you know. Some guys are born at the bottom and climb, and they also get faints and stuff as long as they werent too Omega or were able to climb enough to prove they belonged up there all the way.
We’re organized in a way where the winners are the most attractive. And, girls, or, the feminine, is built to screen for the traits the winners have. The result is that the vast majority of girls are screening for the top guys, and that’s it.
Got it? stop whining about hypergamy. For every girl who only feels attracted to the top guys and is rejecting beta nice guys… there’s a guy whos practicing and improving himself and trying to climb, so he becomes mr Right. We have hypergamy for the same reason we have the male sex drive and it’s desire to fight compete and climb. You wouldnt want this in any other way. Or I wouldnt.
So. Girls are screening for the guys at the top, and, the guys at the top have options, and, have more social value than the girls.
Say whatever you want about girls and stars and stuff. You know the maximum value a girl can have in the ladder, in the SMP, is being wanted. Girls value is being wanted, being spent into. By whom?
Top guy’s value is what they built. Not themselves, but their legacy, what they do, the value they represent. Then they sit at the top of their own mountain. The dude is the mountain.
Top girl’s value is being wanted and purchased by the top guys. Voilah. And top top guys can purchase more than one top girl.
Am I hurting your sensibilities again? Masculinity is about surplus, having it, producing it, and spending it. Look at Dicaprio. Remember when you felt more admiration for Brad Pitt before he decided to put all of his seeds in the same sack.
Femininity is about controlling and being wise with your limited resources, maximizing it’s value, attracting the best of the best seed. That’s why you get disgusted when you see a hot, hot girl, all drunk and messing around with a “loser”. You know she’s worth “more”.
So what’s love have to do with this? nothing.
When people talk about true love, the love in movies etc… they are usually talking about this mystical team and soul matey thing where people complement each other and bond for life and do all kind of marvellous things together. Eh. For two hours. Maybe it’ll get boring so let’s label it “and happy ever after… ” not much to tell?
There’s an angle, the spiritual one, which transcends the form, the shape of things and goes to the bone.
Unconditional love can be all ways of sick (love you and accept you even if you become an abusive drug addict kind of love), but, true love in its most abstract form is when this feeling of love just goes and surrenders and fills the other person without an ego on it, without a form, without a business. True love in it’s spiritual way is like giving all of your money to somebody, then doing it again, then doing it again.
Yes. So unconditional love can be stupid. Surrendering to true love and loving to its fullest, can be stupid. That’s why screening is so important. And if you plan on loving someone forever… screening is all. You have to screen for someone who’s not just going to take all of your gifts and leave you in the dumpster.
And screening isnt love. Screening is well, screening.
But, back to love.
TRUE LOVE AS SALVATION
What people really talk about when this “true love” comes in play, is acceptance. Is ego validation.
See. Only beta and nice guys talk about this shit. There’s a reason all the bullshit about true love and salvation has been written by male losers. Girls are not interested in true love. You dont see them chasing true love. But you see them chasing and finding and keeping mr Right. The “love” is just what they feel while they are chasing the WHOM.
True love is sold as finding the ONE. But, for women, this means screening one among MANY. It’s picking the best from the best among a surplus. Its ONE or… it’s gonna be some one else.
For men, it’s the opposite, it’s salvation, its ONE or nothing. ONE or disappearing.
… you get what Im getting at?
This is the killer:
Betas and nice guys and under are after true love – as a thing – because they dont have any other option.
Betas and nice guys need love, because true love is their only chance at survival if at all.
True love is the only REASON someone would want to be with them.
True love – finding a soul mate, is the only way they could attract a hot girl and pass their genes.
True love, because they are unattractive, but maybe there’s ONE girl that will see them.
Yes, that’s how scarce it is.
True love is, simply, salvation from the SMP.
True love, for a beta nice guy, is finding someone who loves them at expenses of their value in the SMP.
True love means someone who’s with you and sees value in you even when you dont find that value in yourself.
True love = you got lucky. Which is a shorty for “I dont know what the fuck is going on”
True love is for suckers.
Because while the beta nice guy is feeling lucky and thinks he found salvation and yada yada, the girl is all aware about his status of mr Right, knows where he fits, where he doesnt, where his strengths are, where his weakness are.
There’s no innocence about it.
You keep dreaming about true love while she’s taking this seriously. You keep being a romantic, where shes doing a real business here. A serious, make it or break it assessment. And she has to be cautious because she’s not feeling it. And since she’s not feeling it, she cant relax. So you dont “have” her after all. She had to settle – even if just for a short while – because the time ran out or her body told her so.
See. For girls, other than the kids if she has them, finding and bonding and pairing with mr Right is all that matters.
Sure, you can have “true love” when you’re in the union. You can exchange the sweet energy and couple and make the machine move and have a partnership. But with girls, the WHO is more important than the WHAT.
Guys have a surplus and can fool around. Heck. Some guys even have several families at the same time.
For girls this is deadly serious. Limited resources and investment.
LJBF -> STUD
So, back to the original M3/HUS topic (yes read that post if you havent). You had a guy who was chasing her around, putting her on a pedestal and all. A guy putting her on a pedestal = needy = loser = unattractive, which just means SHE can do better.
See, the top guys that girls are after, have options, and options mean these top guys are not worried about “true love” being the “salvation”. The beautiful thing about the top guys is that, fuck, they SCREEN as well. Top guys can afford to have standards – thus, you being upset when they dont.
How does your concept of true love stand up against “screening” girls because you have too many options, and many of them could be “true love”, and, heck, you can have “true love” with several of them at the same time?
Do I hear some hearts cracking? don’t worry baby, it gets better.
So the top guys not only have a surplus of resources but also a surplus of options where to invest them. If you know about economy you’ll see that makes all these options have a diminished value, lower than if they were your only option or if you needed any specific one as “salvation”. Salvation from WHAT for God’s sake.
So the top guys have options. This translates to cockiness, to a stronger frame control, to stronger boundaries, to a lighter humor, to cruelty in some cases, to power, to abuse of power, to increased responsibility, to self autonomy, self reliance, to not caring about others, to being a badass, to having your own ideas and goals to be more important than everyone elses -> thus leading other men into reaching your goals. Etc.
And femininity is built to screen and be attracted and want to pair and bond and reproduce with such traits. Fuck love. The girl feels attracted to such traits, just like a guy gets a boner with a good ass and tits and an angelical face. Deal with it.
So, the guys at the top have options, and they screen back.
The process of screening girls back is called teasing / push pull / etc. When a girl finds a guy whos able to screen and is not just running, chasing after each girl, all desperate because he doesnt know better nor has better, she feels “fuck, finally I found a real man”
Which is all she really cared about.
Do you see it? a real man, mr Right, is also a guy who doesnt need and is not after real love, at least not in it’s salvation/needy form. A guy who screens back and can push back. A guy who might “want” real love, but who has it with a hefty price tag. And a price tag she has to pay for.
“All the other guys… try to chase her. But here’s her number, so call her, maybe.”
So back to topic. You had this guy who was chasing her -> showing her how little he’s worth and not reading her un-boner well, till the point she says “lets just be friends”. Then this guy cuts contact? resumes his life? shows her that he doesnt “need” her and is having fun? his OWN freaking fun?
That’s an immediate boost in value, because he doesnt need, doesnt supplicate, is having fun = has more resources, has more options, maybe he’s above her after all, and maybe if she comes back and says hi he is going to SCREEN her after all, instead of falling at her feet, and thus, below her.
Girls need a guy who stands up above of herself. Girls dont need men who put them on a pedestal etc. You knew that already.
So yes, the moment he drops the pedestal, she’ll want him more.
And that’s quite smart.
No. Did they tell you that love is when you need ONE girl and put her on a pedestal high enough so she can walk all over you, and you would be nothing nothing without her and you would move the earth just to she sees you? no bro. That’s not love. That’s how you talk and feel about a fucking superstar who’s NOT LOOKING BACK at you. That’s creep talk. Move on before the cops arrive.
SO WHY BOTHER WITH A LTR?
Short answer… yes why should you?
What do you want it for? to be accepted, to be loved, to be complemented, to have salvation? why are you that lonely?
We used to live in a world were we were groomed for marriage. We dont live in that world anymore. This is a double edge sword. On one hand you can do your own thing, increased freedom, more fun, less responsibility, and on the other hand:
One, that we’re not groomed for long term planning, we’re not groomed to develop character. This is a fucking serious business. Too much fun and too little responsibility = we’re prey for the system, and prey for the circumstances, and, frankly, as a whole we’re short sighted and idiotic.
And two: kids. Man. Kids needs parents. Kids need adults. Kids need stability, they dont need fractured homes with workaway parents and single moms with several boyfriends in a row who play dad. Kids need a dad. And a mom. And need to learn healthy boundaries and learn the mechanics of loving adults who respect and nourish and complement each other. They do. We dont have enough of them.
Well thanks feminism or whatever happened to destroy the nuclear family. In the name of all the kids in the world, fuck you.
But whatever, this is the reality we live now. If you want to build a nuclear family and have healthy kids, then you NEED to screen for a long term relationship. Forget about short term fun. Start screening for character and stuff now. NOW.
This isnt what girls are screening in their majority though. Girls dont need a man to stick around, see? they dont need you to be there and provide and be a dad. They only need the fun the rush and the money / sperm, if so.
So why you, as a man, would bother with a LTR? if you want a family right now, and you’re willing to screen out 99% of the girls out there, you have to bother with it. If you’re not, then you just shouldnt.
There’s no point to attempt an LTR in fun-screening world.
I mean. What is a LTR that you know is going to end. What makes it “long”? a year? two? how much are you willing to work and invest for a “long” relationship that has a short duration? why are you going there to begin with?
If you’re a beta nice guy, the response is: it’s your only chance to get some ass. Love and affection and stability and true match is all you can aspire to and is the only card you can play in this SMP. No body wants you but maybe ONE will. And since it’s your only card, its a limited resource, and you really need it and you’d be very lucky if it played out well. Fuck, it’s already on a pedestal.
In short, dont go there. Because when you become “lucky”, in reality you just found a girl who “settled” with you but aspires to more than you. A girl who’s still in screening mode. As she should. Because she shouldnt be with you to start with, but with mr Right, and she’s not there to help you become mr Right but to remind you every day that you’re not.
In an old fashioned world, or with an old fashioned guy and girl… screening helps to help your partner. The screening complements each other and saves the love and makes it stronger. She sees he’s not measuring up? she helps him. He sees she’s not taking care of herself (and becoming unattractive) he helps her. There are problems? each uses their intelligence instincts etc to sum. They take care of each other. Man this even brings a tear to my eye! it’s so romantic.
Have you ever seen this? yes? you want this? then drop the world and put all your pieces into a single purpose and find that one, screen the world out, drop current society. Find the one and be the one.
No? not ready to go there, not yet, not ever? is it too risky, improbable? then dont.
But as a man, whatever you choose to do, climb the ladder. Shut up, work your ass, and work the ladder. You were born here to compete and win. If you dont have the drive, cut whatever is sucking you out and find the drive. You’re here to climb that shit and own it. Just as girls are here to find mr Right. So be mr Right. The one you were born to be. Then shit get’s easy.
Become the king who owns the resources and pulls the strings and is a badass.
Then you might have true love, the one that doesnt require salvation.
At least in Manga the good guys have superpowers. And a clean soul.
What always bothers me about the way the good vs evil fight is examined and portrayed in occident, is that it’s ALWAYS about the evil.
It’s always about the sin, the impure, the guilt, the suffering, the tragedy, the negative, the monster and it’s shade, the crime, the punishment, the fear, the threat, the injustice, the warnings, the judgement.
In tv and movies, you’ll get to see demons, from human to supernatural and all the twisted variations, each more interesting than the previous, in all their wide open range of fuckedupness. Sometimes you have a hero… with a troubled soul. Sometimes you get to see angels, pastors… who are also fighting their own demons – they dont incarnate “good”, they just have a job. And sometimes you get to see God… as just another boring regular dude with no fucking clue and no authority. They are not good because they are are good, but because they are defined against evil. Ah, but the evil has all the lights and effects, powers, and sexiness, and a self of it’s own.
Then we have shows like Mad Men, House, Big Bang Theory, Rescue me and so many others, which are all about the shades of wicked, the shades of jaded, the broken, the dysfunction. And dont get me started on mainstream “news”.
There’s no culture of good.
The reason there’s no progress towards good is that no one is even looking in that direction.
Deti just left this at Detination, well worth reposting.
Though I don’t agree with all aspects of their lifestyles, and despite what I’ve said above, I have much respect for players. With a player, what you see is what you get. Players are up front, direct and honest about their intentions, what they want from life and the way they live their lives. Perhaps there are elements of ambiguity in a player’s seduction methods, but no more so than women have been deploying in their mating and sexual strategies since hypergamy was released from her Pandora’s box at least 30 years or so ago. Any woman who gets with a player gets with him because she wants to get with him — and she will have to live with whatever consequences flow from that. Players have surveyed the landscape and taken stock of their talents and drawbacks. They have made what I consider to be fully rational lifestyle choices, given the world they inhabit. Players know they live in a feminine-centric society that has expressly chosen unrestrained hypergamy over patriarchy. Players recognize they live in a world of unfettered female sexuality that assigns greater value to raw displays of masculinity and little value to marriage and lifetime coupling, Women have been told, nay, encouraged, to do and say anything they want, with anyone they want, whenever and wherever they want, and that they will suffer absolutely no adverse consequences for it. I can’t fault players for doing what they can to turn such a situation to their advantage, or at least learn to navigate it. Players are putting that old military adage into operation: Adapt. Improvise. Overcome.
I respect MGTOW because I believe it to be a viable, rational lifestyle choice in today’s SMP and the larger society. They also have taken stock and made rational decisions about their lives and the world they live in. Men’s rights activists do good work. They are sounding the alarm in informing men about divorce and its devastating effects on men, women, children, and society. The destruction of the family is the destruction of Western society. These men are given hope, told they are not alone, and work to get something to live for after their money, jobs, and children are taken from them. I don’t believe there will be a “men’s rights movement”. Short of doing work at the margins and making small improvements in the lives of divorced fathers, men for a number of reasons won’t organize into a movement to preserve and protect male rights. Men do not subscribe to such notions as “the personal is political”. For men, the political is political, and the personal is personal, and never the twain shall meet.
“Man up, stop playing those videogames and marry the high N over 30 woman who’s now ready to settle down after 10 or so years on the carousel” simply won’t do. It won’t do because a growing number of men have gotten wise to the lies, are figuring out what is really going on the SMP, and have stopped listening. If it is to survive — if indeed Western society is to survive — the North American Church must return to advocacy of patriarchy, in which men’s contributions and leadership are valued and cherished, and to which the women and children willingly submit.
ON THE CHURCH
I am not a traditionalist, or a traditional conservative. I am not a Churchian. I do not subscribe to the tenets of liberal Churchianity. Modern Churchianity and tradconism have become willing tools and useful idiots for feminism, which has shot through and infected much of the old line conservative and Churchian institutions. Those institutions wink and nod at women (including Churchian women) playing by the new rules of hookup, one-night stands, serial monogamy as the preferred, “more moral” form of promiscuity, intentional single motherhood, and “I’m not haaaappy” divorce, all with unlimited choices for women while simultaneously requiring no commitment from them. At the same time, modern Churchianity and tradconism demand that men play by 1950s rules of securing education and lucrative employment; courtship; supplication; traditional dinner-and-a-movie dating requiring immediate displays of monetary and time investment; and ultimate commitment in the form of hitching him to the plow of a wife who neither loves nor respects him in a society that is doing everything it can to sabotage and destroy his marriage. It encourages men to waste their money, their time and their lives in the service of ungrateful, unworthy women. And all of it is this way because women as a group, with their white knight and mangina accomplices, want it this way; while the Churchian establishment gives its tacit cooperation in the form of heretical “theology”.
Im a Christian. I am a Nicene Creed-style believer. I believe Game and patriarchy have their roots in the Bible. I’m also a complementarian. I believe male dominant/female submissive and sex within the confines of lifetime marriage are the most beneficial orderings of male-female relations. The evidence of this is all around us — men and women innately and automatically seek to order themselves into maledom/femsub relationships even in STRs and LTRs, even in “serial monogamy”, even outside marriage, even in fleeting sexual encounters. Men and women yearn to order themselves in this way because the Designer designed them this way — because God ordered it and placed those desires into every human being. Men and women ignore this fact at their extreme peril of grinding unhappiness, grief and misery. The prime source of dissatisfaction in the SMP arises from the fact that sex and relationships short of marriage are unsatisfying, incomplete imitations of marriage which are nearly always destined to failure.
I believe sluts can reform and make themselves into marriageable women. I believe this is very difficult and most women are unable to do this, and still more are unwilling to do the necessary work. I believe alphas can make themselves into marriageable men if they choose. I believe most alphas choose not to marry. I believe these things because I have faith in God’s redeeming power and ability to make all things new. I believe God can do what humans cannot. I believe the SMP looks the way it does because humans have screwed it up, just like they screw everything up. I realize my beliefs in this regard put me into a minority in the Manosphere.
Deti, July 6 2012
So most men have trouble talking to and taking initative with women. Why? because:
A) Men are trained to put women on a pedestal. So it doesnt matter if the guy went to war and returned and built an empire and then cured cancer: when he talks to a woman, he still feels he’s talking to his superior. He has to impress a judge.
B) Men are trained to be ashamed of their sexual desires. So talking / taking initiative with women is a troubling situation: expressing interest while hiding what you really want, being aroused while hiding your cock. Awkward.
So there you go. Approach anxiety = inferiority complex + shame.
To solve this, destroy the pedestal, go up in the social ladder, embrace yourself and your desires fully, and you’re golden. You’re welcome.
And yes, women like men who dont put them on a pedestal, men who’re confident / know what they want / are not ashamed of themselves.
And no, dont pay too much attention to the girl on the video since she’s talking from the pedestal (the issue is not about how you feel about the approach, honey, that’s not what triggers the anxiety). Though if you mentally replace her saying “approaching us” with “showing us your cock”, it makes for a fun watch.
* * *
It’s interesting that in comparison, women are trained that they should be put on a pedestal, and to take care of their “apparent” sexual desire, to look more slutty or more chaste… Or, I dont think I have heard a “woman, you should be ashamed of your sexual desires”.
Acting on those, or looking like she acted on those, yes. But the desires themselves? hum.
Why do you think that is?
He’s funny and got a few things right, but, really?
He thinks the stud is the perfect beta.
The thinks the stud is the guy who does all the work, all the put-her-on-a-pedestal bullshit, but does it better. The perfect emotional tampon and supportive friend. The guy who cries about her cat stories and takes her to nice dinners and does all the classic supplication dance. Yeah buddy, that’s the stud! what do you think it’s their secret, man? maybe you just have to try a lil harder, ya know!? how about this pink tshirt? which flowers would she want you to bring today? cmon! show that you care! show a lil effort!
Hint: the stud is the man who makes her FORGET about all that shit, cat story included. The stud is the man she daydreams about, the man who makes her lose her sense of reality, the man she cant resist to desire to be all wrapped around, the man who takes her into HIS reality. And then this guy is so valuable every other girl also wants to jump on his lap. That’s what makes him the stud.
Not the guy who’s compensatory and supplicates for a “chance” to be in her proximity, while hidding what he really wants, and attempting a transactional relationship, because he knows she doesnt want HIM.
Somebody save this guy from becoming nicer and cutting his own balls.
Video thanks to Deep Dish.
Looking at the positive side, at least the boredom lasted for a lifetime. In a more contemporary fashion, she would have divorced at least once, even if just to keep the hype on.
Video thanks to DJDamage.
This idea keeps making the rounds: “Betas created western civilization”.
Betas built it. Like ants or workers in a factory or soldiers. And their submissive, cooperative, conflict-avoiding sheeple-like nature was key to this.
They didn’t create it though. Not an inch of it. They built everything, everything under the supervision of a mix of Alphas and Wicked, who did engineer the whole thing, and extracted labor, blood and sweat from beta as needed.
Betas built it. And the system they built was engineered against them. To keep them there. Misinformed, lost and low.
When I see the beta praise for the system, I see the same as a slave in a Lousiana farm taking pride for having “created the farm” that keeps them all alive. If only they knew.
Im starting a campaign so Deti starts his own blog. He just left this at Dalrock’s. Only edited for coherence and dramatism.
* * *
What I’m going to say will sound harsh, so I apologize in advance.
She LJBF’d you after you showed interest. You befriended her anyway. She was seeing someone else and is now out of reach. You don’t like LJBF, you resent it, and you’re vacillating between making another try at her affections or just being friends or walking away.
Walking away and cutting off all contact with her is the best option. Never, never be friends with any woman who LJBFs you explicitly or implicitly. What are you getting out of this “friendship”? She gets affirmation and validation in the form of attention from a man whom she knows wants a romantic relationship with her. You get nothing. She is using you and wasting (at the very least) your time.
Do absolutely nothing for a woman who LJBFs you. Do not spend time with her unless you and she happen to be in the same place with mutual friends. Do not give her any one on one time. Do not be her friend. Do not indulge her by listening to her stories of her a**hole boyfriends, her pump & dump misadventures, or how “I just want a nice guy who will treat me right.” Don’t return her phone calls or texts. Under no circumstances should you ever spend any money on her or give her any help with anything.
Women are the gatekeepers of sex. But YOU are the gatekeeper of your investment and commitment. The things you have of value are your time, money, expertise and resources. These things are valuable, and they should not be expended on anyone who is (1) unworthy; or (2) unwilling to reciprocate. This woman wants you to invest in her for free — she wants you to give her your time, money and resources, but she wants, nay, expects, to give you nothing back in return.
Her view on it is that all she has to do is grace you with her very presence, to dollop out small amounts of her attention on you, and you should simply want to reciprocate with your time.
No. That is a waste of your time, and you should put an end to it now.
* * *
Men who do this for women are called emotional tampons. The analogy is sound. The woman bleeds her emotions all over the man, who is expected to absorb them. The woman then discards the man and gives him no further thought.
In response to Badger
Ah. Girls who have bitch shields. Surprise surprise: the “shield” is actually a part of herself. One that she uses when she feels above of something. Which she likes. Hint: it’s not going anywhere.
The bitchy side doest mean she has more value. It means that a part of her is rotten. Like a rotten fruit. What do you do when you find a rotten fruit… do you try to spin it harder and chew it carefully so you can get to the good part? or do you drop it and get a good one? or, sure you can chew the whole thing, but is that what you do when you have options?
In order to get on top of her bitch shield and disarm her you have to possess more value than her, so she lowers her bitchy game and and gives you a bridge – a reason to keep interacting. But if you have more value than her, why exactly are you trying to win over a bitch?
That game is rigged to be a hell of a sour ride.
In short, don’t waste your time with them. The worst thing that could happen is that you work your ass and actually get her, and then have to sort through her bitchy and non bitchy crazy-making sides on a daily basis.
Twice the effort and half the juice.
I made some bold resolutions a few months ago… Im almost done buying audio toys (lol), for real, and I just moved to a beautiful 24th floor where Im going to build the record / mix room in the next couple of months. Have a look!
Now I only have another 15 milestones to reach.
“Most men, myself included, have been trained to either ignore emotions or only relate to the ones that matter to women. I didn’t personally go all the way with that, though I’m unsure if that was a choice due to art or me drawing a line and telling society to fuck off.
Woe to the man who gets in touch with his passionate anger.”
Men who control their emotions are better suited to survive. A proper man, a strong and confident man, has to excel under stress, has to appear to make easy what is hard for everyone else. And then this man should have enough spare emotional energy to enjoy life and reap on the profits, and reproduce, and pass down his legacy. Cue: the grumpy man doesnt cut it.
But the shortcut to mastering your emotions is having none.
Does it work? yeah. Short term it does. The wave of bullshit is coming? turn it off. You have an efervescence of bad feelings and anxiety surging inside and cant turn it off? shake it out. Put it out there. Hit stuff. Man up. You don’t want to lose it under pressure. Don’t want to deal with it. Turn it off. Vampire Diaries style.
But this doesnt allow you to understand your own feelings / emotions, and, at the end, your emotions are the ones in charge, not your rational brain nor your skills. Your emotions sustain your belief and your identity and are the glue for your relational networks. So if you’re not aware and dont have emotional intelligence, if you cant command and understand and feel, and your emotional skills are limited to turn stuff off, block control repress and redirect, youre an EASY pray for emotional manipulators.
Guess whos manipulating you? Media. Society. Religions. Family. Friends. People. Relationships. Everyone. And your own emotions, that you dont control, are also manipulating other people. It’s a dark game played behind curtains and the most evident sign is what happens when you question it all.
It’s not the rational mind what’s blocking you. It’s not a logical puzzle. Question your life right now. The country, the city, the friends, your god, your pillars, and say: it’s all bullshit. Cancel your story. Take your most sacred belief and question it. Can you? or something inside shakes away from it?
What you cant handle you dont own. It owns you. You’re it’s bitch. And how exactly did you get into this position, where you respond to something and are unable to question, but you go with it. When exactly did you agree to be something else’s bitch? when did you surrender? do you remember? what if you hadnt?
Or. Who benefits from this? Who created this shit?
But I might be getting in too deep. Here’s where Emma would chime in:
“That.. sounds very profound, although I didn’t quite grasp it.”
Thanks baby, I get that a lot.
And. Women. You would think that since women are not taught to repress their emotions they are better off. But, no, since women are protected and treated like children and get a free pass and have other people to take on the consequences for them and get free respect and the natural entitlement that follows… no. They have access to a wider range of emotions, but one that is also out of touch with reality and stuck in the childhood, a meaningless, out of control limbo / mess of preferences and unsorted waves of sensorial, biological urges and minute bullshit. Sorry. Emotions for their own sake are not enlightment.
Intelligence is the ability to solve problems. The communication with reality and the know-how define it.
You have one gender with contact with reality but no emotional lexicon. And the other gender with emotional lexicon but no contact with reality.
And then we’re all manipulated through fear.
Where are we again?
Who are we, again?