There is a contempt point that seems to elude Tyler and every other PUA instructor, even when this is at the very foundation of Game:
1 ) Women are attracted to high value, confident, dominant, successful, abundance minded, social proofed, cocky, funny, resourceful, grown up, attractive, men.
2 ) The one with less value chases the one with higher value. The one with the more needy frame concedes to the one with the less needy frame. The one who needs the less controls the interaction.
3 ) 1+2 = women are naturally attracted to high value men who dont need them back as much. Once in this position, women surrender and are happy to be led, and they complement their man in every way they can and keep him happy, because he’s still a catch. She follows him, he doesnt follow her. It’s a dance.
4 ) All this wording is just: Hypergamy.
5 ) When other girls want what she has, that makes her desire increase.
6 ) Once she’s attracted to a man, once that fully kicked in, nothing else matters. As long as the strong attraction is there, as long as his high-value is there, he can do anything, other people can do and say anything: the bond will stay. Like Rollo says, “Hypergamy doesn’t care”
7 ) In other words, Hypergamy also trumps Game. Or, everything done under Hypergamy, either increases attraction or is invisible to attraction.
8 ) If she wants a man she makes it easy for him. If she doesn’t want a man, she makes it hard for him. And when I say easy / hard, I really mean those words.
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Good? we all know that right? so.
1 ) You only need to “approach” women because they are not chasing you.
2 ) Every time you “open” a girl you have to establish the whole frame again? because you have nothing built.
3 ) What keeps you in the “approach” phase is that you’re low value. Actually, you keep playing the game because it reinforces your low value. You get tiny, short validations that pump your value up, a little, and make you have insecure dreams of glory and “what could have been”, then you go back to the comfort of the low value. You’re playing an addiction game.
4 ) If you’re low value, your interactions with girls will be of the hard kind. If you’re high value, your interactions will be the easy kind. If you plan to have thousands of interactions, on which flavor do you want them? easy or hard?
5 ) Having lots of hard, low value interactions is not how you raise your value. Losing is not how you win. There’s failure and defeat and loss and mistakes on the roadmap, of course, but losing is not how you win. Winning is how you win.
6 ) So how do you want your next 1000 interactions to be like, again? easy, or hard? do you want an uphill battle, or a landslide? do you want to be embraced, or rejected? easy, or hard? abundance, or scarcity? success, or failure? what are you after?
Do you want to be successful with women, for real?
Make it easy.
Instead of keeping your current value and position in the chain, and approaching thousands of girls while trying to emulate upper value behaviors… upper your own value in the chain, and socialize everyone, thousands of people, while you’re at it, and develop real upper value behaviors that are consistent with your real upper value in the chain.
Grow up your persona and your value and make thousands of relationships that STAY. Build a net of connections that STAY. Build.
Build up your value. And socialize. Do you like game? then incorporate Game, whatever you like about it, or all of it, into you. Make what you really like, default, so there’s never a “deflating” back to the “real you”. Change who you really are. Up your value. And interact with a lot of people from there, as you go up.
I can’t say this enough.
So. You’ve seen famous, powerful people, business owners, etc? the guys other guys treat with deference and women flirt with? you’ve seen the guy who clearly owns his circumstances and has everything working for him, and emanates that before even saying a word?
“Approaching” doesnt enter his lexicon.
Fuck. I dont “approach”. I TALK. I MEET PEOPLE. I FORM RELATIONSHIPS. WITH PEOPLE WHO WANTS TO BE WITH ME AND I WANT TO BE WITH. But most of it, really, is just filtering.
Compare. Approaching vs Filtering.
You’re better off spending 3 years building up your value as a man and playing a cumulative game and growth game and socializing with lots of people and women, and knowing what you’re doing, than, spending 3 years with your current value and “approaching” thousands of women while improving your superficial “verbal / behavioral game”, that you’re using so you dont feel that bad about your real low value, anyway.
And over 10 years? it’s a no brainer.
You know that “natural” PUAs keep talking about? A natural is a guy who doesnt “pretend” to have value, but just has it. So have it.
If you want success make it real.