25 Nov 2011, Posted by yohami in game,inner game, 3 Comments.

I have a party on friday, how do I tell you about it? more about shades of gray in dominance.

I have a party on friday, how do I tell you about it? more about shades of gray in dominance:

Submissive (supplicates, doesnt want to offend, puts the other´s frame first, seeks permission, wants to be rejection free):

- Are you busy on friday?
- Is it ok if I make a party?

Doormat (takes direction, does the work, gets the short end of the stick, rejected):

- I made the party, as you wanted. Did I invite all of your friends?
- OH…  .. .,,. ..,.  sure… you can fuck him on my bed.

Beta (compensates, feels inferior, puts the other´s frame first, assumes rejection):

- I hired three elephants and a male stripper just to see if you would come.
- Im sorry. This is not the best party ever.

Codependent (provides direction, but seeks input actively, highly sensible to rejection):

- Hey lets make a party on friday?
- Is everybody ok with this? Yes? What about the theme?

Aloof (proposes, but is unattached to the result, doesnt negotiate, is rejection-proofed):

- Yo, Im hosting a party, are you coming.

Dominant (tells you what the result is, puts its frame first, exposes itself, gets little rejection because of its frontality):

- Cancel your plans, party at my house. Now.
- It´s gonna be fun. Lets go.

Controlling (sets the frame, negative picky-ness, reactive against rejection):

- The party is on friday. I´ll be pissed off if you dont come.
- Be punctual this time.

Control freak (monopolizes the chaos, while attempting to fix everything, burdens):

- Cake arrives at 8. Everybody has to dress properly, you will make sure they do, right? Bring me the salt. Do you think couple X are going to come? I shouldnt have invited them. NO! I told you the SALT!
- You RUINED it!

Bully (invades / demeans other people´s frames, doesnt bring anything, rejects and takes at the same time):

- This party is a piece of shit. You´re a piece of shit.
- You look like a fucking clown. Now blow me, bitch.

Omega (lives in the rejected spectrum of the frame, and, of course, resents it):

- Again I didnt get an invitation. I dont know if I should go. I dont know anyone there anyway.
- I hate their fucking guts.

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Anyway, come to my party.